A few years ago, on my 30th birthday, my wife graced me with a beautiful guitar. It is the best sounding, easiest playing, most gorgeous guitar I've ever seen and heard.
Yes, I'm biased. But it was one of those gifts that was so nice, I questioned whether or not I deserved it. My first thought was, I'm not a good enough guitar player to own such an amazing guitar.
The truth is, leading up to the purchase, I knew she wanted to buy me a nice guitar. But she wanted to get something I would love and appreciate. So I was doing a lot of research and I came across a guy on YouTube that compared lots of different guitars on his channel.
One of the things he said was something to the tune of,
Some people feel like they don't deserve a guitar like this because they aren't good enough or whatever. Don't feel like that. If you want the guitar and you'll obviously appreciate the guitar, then you deserve the guitar.
Ever since hearing this guy encourage people to purchase or have things that they actually want and will appreciate, I had a change in my thinking. I questioned why I think I don't deserve nice stuff.
Maybe it's just the appreciation of the instrument, knowing that a better musician can get more out of the guitar than I ever could. Or maybe it's deeper than that.
Whatever the case, I usually question whether or not I'm deserving of the exact thing that I want. There's a pause that I go through. I'm almost in disbelief if I do get it.
Do I really deserve to have the very thing I want?
I liken it to those home improvement shows. I always make fun of the people who cry when they walk through all their newly renovated rooms in the house. Quite a few people will actually shed tears looking at the kitchen of their dreams, realizing it's finally theirs.
I become almost cynical. Judging them for being happy about the way their room is organized. “First-world problems!”
I was raised with this idea that nice things aren't all that important, and certainly shouldn't dictate happiness. People are important. I've tried to cling to that.
But I'd be a liar if I didn't say some material things are very valuable to me. We all probably become the sobbing middle-aged woman on HGTV at some point.
My thoughts recently are, if you can afford that thing, and you're going to appreciate the hell out of it, then you deserve that thing.
Sometimes we just need a reason to smile. The days can feel long. But if you can strum a guitar that gives you an extra bit of satisfaction and makes you feel good, then strum away.
It's those extra bits of spoiling yourself in life that can sometimes replace a dark cloud on a dreary day. So don't feel guilty and don't judge yourself. Really, you deserve the thing. Whatever it is.
I don't think I've ever watched HGTV, but I do appreciate this sentiment and encouragement! Thanks for another Friday Fire Thoughts, Eric.